The past few days has been somewhat productive for me in the most indirect way as possible. I was serious when I said that I wanted to make a business in writing. But circumnavigating cyberspace on how to get things done… It’s just not the same when you have a pen or pencil to write a book. And sometimes, it gets very discouraging for me to try anything.
Now, does that mean I’m quitting? Absolutely not. This is just a mere inconvenience; not an obstacle.
What I am aware of is this: whenever the human mind is distracted, we’re unconsciously practicing avoidance. Especially when we have something that we ought to work on. It’s like another form of procrastination that we had when we were in school.
“Sure, I have a month to do that project, but, meh, I don’t feel like doing it right now. Let’s play Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 on the PlayStation 3!”
It’s the same crap.
Let’s take me for an example. I’ve been wanting to get this business going and I really haven’t done it yet. This site has been up since May and I sometimes feel like I didn’t do much progress. Now, I have been writing, but not for the thought of profit or any gains. If you follow me, you know that I have the excerpts/the portfolio that I’ve worked on. Even the review for Peterson’s We Who Wrestle with God was freshly written. I just needed material for this site and there is still so much I need to put in. But that’s another can of worms.
Yesterday I spent a whole day working on a poem for one of my stories. The reason being is that I introduced the beginning of this epic fantasy to my writers’ group. They enjoyed it. Actually, it’s the same excerpt I have in my portfolio: Tales of The Myst: The Evanescence of Legacy.
Well, dammit, it happened to me again. Got distracted because I was thinking of my book and poem. Back to the post.
They liked my first chapter and it got my dopamine running. I decided to sit down and go over my second chapter for “hundredth” time. I’ve been working on this book since I was 11, so I made lots of revisions with it. The second and first chapters are just the tip of the ice burg.
The second chapter is important because it gives a full, proper introduction of a character who plays a vital role. AND she sings. The problem is I don’t! In fact, I’m terrible with poetry. I love reading poetry, but I suck at it. From 11 in the morning to 12 midnight I wrote. I tried to make lyrics for a song and I’m not sure it would work with a melody in mind.
What does this have to with being distracted? Simple: I made an excuse of working on something else. I was trying to be productive on an alternate project rather than my business. Going to the gym, walking my dogs, or helping family; I would use these as excuses. And I feel a little ashamed of it.
The thing is I want to get my business going, but I find myself doing more studies than actions. Let me explain: I’m trying to set up a gig on Fiverr.com. But I have never done any copy writing. I’ve only heard about it and was told that it requires nothing special; they say it’s easy to do.
Fair enough. But doing it online is something that I’m not too familiar with. I’ve never done online business and I don’t know how to go about it. Normally, when I do business, I like to see a person’s face and talk to them. You know, like a regular human being! But this landscape where I have to navigate through menus, options, prices, content… I just feel overwhelmed.
Even coming here, thinking about “Okay, I’ve got to write something,” makes me not want to write something. But, dammit, I have to write something! It’s my job! I’m a writer! What do I do instead? Go to the beach, sit down and contemplate niches on what I can copy write for.
Now, I know to some that would feel productive because that’s an exercise in strategy. True, true. But… Probably I’m just eager to get business done, but I can’t help but categorize myself as an “avoider.” I really want to say “coward,” but I’m REALLY trying not to be hard on myself. And if that wasn’t enough, I sat on the sat on the beach read Sapkowski’s Sword of Destiny. I justified that as “exercising” and learning from the masters. In order for you to be a good writer, you need to read good books after all. As much as I think that’s” avoidance,” I actually enjoyed it.
It just bothered me that WordPress and Fiverr were in my head and instead, I focused on other things. Productive things, but other things.
So, was today any different? Yes! Yes, it was. I did get on Fiverr and decided to take action on some form of copy writing. Now I understood, that I couldn’t take the big business deals like these other freelance writers do. BUT… I can start off small. And that’s when I decided I would go for a niche that’s small enough and familiar enough for me. And since I’m hyper-conscientious of my work, I wanted to make my services affordable since I’m just starting out.
I decided I would copy write for other writers who want their books published and recognized. Yes, it’s small, yes, it’s not a big industry (or so I think), yes, I’m not making the lottery. But damn it, at least I’m trying and building and that’s what counts. Of course, there are small inconveniences that make me stop and want a break. Like making a showcase for your previous work when you’re just beginning, but that’s not the point!
The point is to voluntarily face the adversity, no matter how much bull**** is involved to follow bull**** guidelines. And it doesn’t hurt to take your time with it. Start slow, start small. Life is not a bloody sprint, it’s a marathon. Just take as much responsibility that you can bear. The best thing about it is this is not school. In projects like these, there are no deadlines and you can take as much time as you need. BUT… it’s very important that you take some form of action.
Look at this post for instance. I was THIS close to saying, “Meh, I can do it tomorrow.” But my conscious was eating me from within, knowing that I HAD to write something. Anything.
Today I wanted to write a piece about the so-called Online Safety Act, but thought it was a sensitive topic. So, I put it off. But my conscience bothered me about it: “THIS is what writers do!” Write from the heart regardless of what others think. Isn’t that what thinkers did, like Socrates? And he voluntarily DIED for it! What sort of daemon does it take for a man to face that kind of adversity?
I think the thing that sets me off, primarily, on this topic is conscious. It’s the thing that guides us. It’s the voice that tells us we should work on that science project for school when we want to play Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 on our PlayStation 3.
Yeah, I know, I’m feeling nostalgic, alright?
The point being is that conscious has been the one thing that always bothers me if I’m not fulfilling something. And it’s something anyone can listen to and attend to it. Forget about work, it’s the thing that tells you to wash your car. It’s the voice that tells you to approach that one girl and talk to her. It’s the one voice that tells you to clean up your dishes for your mother. It’s the one inner voice that hearkens you to action.
It’s the one voice that brought me here to write this. To expand. And hopefully to garner outreach. To help me accomplish my dream. And it’s the only reason why this post exists.
So, what should you do if you’re distracted?
- Become aware. Know that it’s a form of avoidance.
What are you avoiding?
- Sit down. Meditate. Listen.
What does your conscious tell you? What is one thing in your environment that you can change to calm that conscious, that daemon?
- Once you pinpoint it, take action.
Is the responsibility too big?
- Baby steps. Make a plan, have some deadlines exclusively for yourself, and take small forms of action, day by day.
Remember, life isn’t a race. It doesn’t have to be. It’s just a marathon we can all take. You have all the time in the world and you just do what you can.
But make sure you actually do something. Your K/D ratio of CoD:MW2 may be legendary, but the results of your project will be sh***y. The same applies for the rest of life. I hope this helps someone.
Have a good night and take care.
God bless.
8/1/2025
23:35